The Angel From My Nightmarish Love Story of DOOM!
by icekweem23
Summary: GADR, Dib's POV. NOW FINALLY COMPLETED! What would you do if your sister fell in love with you? My first ever fan fiction story. The PG-13's for the coupling, cussing and graphic content (violence, this is NOT a lemon)... Please R & R!
1. Introduction

The Angel From My Nightmare  
  
Note: This story was made for Invader Zim fans, though I think I wrote it in a way that anyone with an open mind and heart can enjoy... Warning- horrible weirdness and INCEST apparent in this story.  
  
Updates:  
  
May 4, 2004 – Thanks for the reviews everyone... Chapter 8 IS FINALLY UP! It's short and sweet as I promised, and leaves a lot for the next chapter to explain. They took down my updates page... Shoulda read the rules first... Lol. Anyway I combined the Updates and Introduction page... And edited Chapter 7 a little bit. Don't leave yet- I've still got another chapter to write, and the upcoming coda for this story is the most important bit! And for those who miss the wordy way I wrote the first chapters, chapter 9 will bring things back full circle, don't worry. ^_^  
  
Oh, and one more thing. If this is successful I'll write Gaz's POV of the entire fic, just because I can. Tell me if I should.  
  
April 27, 2004 – Chapter 7 is back up... Changed the ending. Chapter 8 isn't going to be the last... It'll be short and sweet. ^_^ And I changed the format of the story so that this update page, the introduction and chapter one are in different pages.  
  
April 19, 2004 – took Chapter 7 down for some editing. I read it when I was sober and hated it. Not like anyone will care anyway.  
  
April 15, 2004 – Chapter 7 is up!!! Hehe... I can't believe I actually finished this one. ^_^ Hope y'all like this one... It's more Invader Zimmy than the other chaps, methinks, so don't take it too seriously. It's probably the most shallow one out of the series... The next one will the be the last... And it shouldn't take too long. Cheers.  
  
April 14, 2004 – a few days ago I posted an edited version of chapter 6 which is a little less melodramatic... Thanks to everyone who reviewed. Chapter 7 will be up soon, I guess.  
  
March 23, 2004 – it's been 3 days and not a single review for chapter 6... T_T is it just me... Or do these things really take time? I'm not sure whether this new, angsty chapter is the best or the worst out of the bunch. I suck at writing angst, and fear that this time I've gone over my head by adding a new dimension to this flawed story. Please, please tell me what you think of it, no matter how nasty it comes out in writing. I NEED OPINIONS. Thank you in advance.  
  
I updated chapter 6 today, ironing out a few rough patches and adding a little bit in about Dib losing hope that I'm not sure is accurate. Oh, and don't worry- Gaz will be back in chapter 7 in a big way. I promise. ^_^  
  
March 21, 2004 – fixed a few errors in chapters 1 and 3 and put anonymous reviews back on... for some reason.  
  
March 20, 2004 – felt inspired tonight so I wrote the last three pages (in MS word that is) of chapter 6 and posted the whole thing here... Hehe. I haven't even proofread the damn thing yet and I'm posting it. Well what can you expect- it's 2 AM and I'm starting to lose it... Anyway... Enjoy! It's the longest chapter yet!  
  
Oh, and by the way, the new title for this fic (I changed it on the 18th I think) is based on a lyric from blink-182's song I Miss You, which I don't own. Buy the album- it rocks! By the way, there's a reference to The Nightmare Before Christmas in the song (...we can live like Jack and Sally if we want...) that I don't think anyone really "got". Cheers.  
  
March 18, 2004 - I know I shouldn't listen to flamers, but... Reading the negative reviews I've gotten from people at 4 AM while working on chapter 6... It hurts. It brings back that feeling of isolation which I hate so very much, especially because in the Philippines, you can't order pizza at 4 AM.  
  
Look, I know a lot of you really hate this coupling and this story... You see, this fic started out as a favor for my ex-girlfriend, who LOVES this coupling, but ever since we broke up I told myself that I WILL finish this one- if only because of the crappy, unfinished LotR and Legend of Zelda fan fiction stories I have lying around my hard drive. And nobody here is going to stop me from completing this one, no matter how crappy it is.  
  
Besides, as one reviewer pointed out, this isn't real life. This is based on characters in a cartoon. Our society in general believes that falling in love with your sibling is wrong. Believe what you want to believe. Get over it. Frankly, I never expected this story to be so controversial...  
  
Please don't judge it 'till it's over.  
  
March 15, 2004 - Changed a few grammatical errors/inconsistencies (locusts- ticks) in Chapter 5... Finally read the reviews I've gotten. Thank you all so much for your comments... And for givin' me my first ego trip... ever. What sucks is that it scares me to go on with this fic now 'coz I'm afraid it's not gonna live up to expectations. ^_^;  
  
But maybe that's my fault 'coz the ending I've planned is so clichéd... Aw well. It can't be helped, I guess.  
  
Thanks again to everyone who took the time to read this. I'll be honest. Compliments keep me alive at 4 am when I have nothing else to hold on to. (Yes, I have no life whatsoever) Guess this is how everyone feels when they first get initiated here, but still. Can't keep from smiling. Maybe I'll actually FINISH this fic. It'd be a first. Cheers.  
  
"I can live for 6 months on a good compliment." Mark Twain  
  
Whew, that was long. Back to the story.  
  
Enjoy... ^_^  
  
DISCLAIMER: Invader Zim, Dib, GIR, Gaz and all other characters and places in this story belong to Jhonen Vasquez and his crew, who have crafted the most kick-ass non-Samurai Jack/Simpsons cartoon ever to grace a television screen. All I own is this humble collection of words right here and how they're arranged.  
  
PS: Johnny the Homicidal Maniac isn't mine, either.  
  
Oh, and my most sincere apologies to JCV (who deserves to be worshipped) for totally ruining his beloved characters with this one. I really am sorry, but I had to write it. The pants command me!!! Do not ignore my veins!!!  
  
Introduction  
  
I remember that day as clearly as any other, now... I'm not sure just how this is going to sound, but... Well I have to tell someone, don't I? Even though it doesn't justify my actions, it does help me accept what I've become. Sorry, I haven't explained what I've been ranting about yet. You see, this is a story about my sister... And me. We're in love. Cringe. Curse at us. It won't make a difference. You weren't there; you don't know how it happened. The truth is, Gaz and I have something that no two siblings in the world do. Besides, the whole thing began so innocently...  
  
Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Dib, and I live in a lavender-colored house with my sister Gaz and my father Membrane. All my life I've been tracking the paranormal- you know, Bigfoot, the Loch Ness monster, hobos... Wait... Forget the hobos. Um... Anyway, a few years ago I hit the mother lode. An alien landed in my town. That's right. Stop reading this if you don't believe me. One day a freaking alien walked right into my class. His name is Zim, and from the day I met him (and his little android sidekick) I vowed never to rest until I've put him in his place (that would be strapped to an autopsy table at the mercy of a dozen scientists). It hasn't been working to well, though. You see, he's hell- bent on taking over the world, and although he isn't very good at it, I find myself constantly needing to keep my bespectacled eyes on him. To cut a long story short, life's been pretty much hell since he arrived here...  
  
So, um... It's kind of a roundabout way of saying it, but... That's my life so far, and the story I'm about to tell you begins early one Sunday afternoon. 


	2. The Trigger

Chapter 1 The Trigger  
  
The door slammed open. I ran upstairs, metallic object in hand, towards my dark room. This was too perfect. My moment of triumph. Finally I had GIR's memory disk, finally Zim would be exposed to the world... And my dream of being the world's foremost paranormal investigator was looking a lot more real. I just had to tell someone. All I remember is my mind was in such a rush I was jumping around like a little child. This time would be it. As I uploaded GIR's files to my computer I wondered why I had never thought of simply asking the childish, malfunctioning android for his memory disk.  
  
"Come on... Come on... 8%... 23%... 37%..."  
  
As the download marker reached 50%, a shred of doubt clouded my mind. Inevitable pessimism. Reason to quell my overexcited self. Chances are, this wouldn't work out. Even at a time like this it's hard for me to stay optimistic- especially since I've been saving the world for 4 years already and nobody seems to notice... I didn't know. Nothing was for certain in this messed up life of mine. A curt voice pierced my conflicting thoughts.  
  
"What are you doing now, Dib?"  
  
I spun around. It was Gaz... My gothic, 14-year old little sister. Without her Game Slave VIII. At the time I was too ecstatic to care, but despite wearing her trademark skull necklace, black dress and striped tights, I remember she looked distinctly different that day. Looking back I know her face at that time is one I'll never forget- one of hopeful curiosity, rather than her usual hateful neglect for me.  
  
"Gaz! I've FINALLY got evidence to incriminate Zim! With this memory disk I'll be able to see EVERY hour of footage that Zim's android has seen since his existence!"  
  
Gaz raised an eyebrow. "Uh... Cool. Hey, listen, could you go with me to the mall? I'm going to---"  
  
"Sorry, Gaz. I've got some work to do. The Swollen Eyeball will be expecting me to send them the data in a few hours."  
  
"Fine," came the discreet reply.  
  
With that Gaz walked away, her head hung low. I didn't hear her teeth grinding. Strange that she should be so nice to me- it was a miracle she hadn't pounded me into the floor yet today. It confirmed my suspicion that lately she was treating me differently. It'd been quite a while since she last beat me up with a baseball bat, and to be honest I kind of missed it. Even though I scream for her to stop hitting me, deep inside I think I'm masochistic. It comes with loneliness- sometimes the pain quells the doubts sprouting from my insecurities...  
  
Could she *really* be treating me like this because she changed? Because she cared? Wishful thinking like that had only broken my heart in the past. Feelings aside, the detective in me had to know why she wasn't being herself anymore.  
  
At the time I had half a heart to chase after her and tell her I'd accompany her to the mall... For the sake of, for once, maybe being able to bond with my sibling who has been so distant with me our whole lives. Right now I'd give anything to have gone with her. But maybe if I did things wouldn't have turned out the way they are now. I'll never know for certain.  
  
Besides, I really wanted to see what was in that memory disk.  
  
The next two hours I spent were reviewing a few of the tapes. It was amazing- seeing the Irken armada, and Zim's two leaders offering him GIR as an "advanced" unit. Based on the videos presented, though, I was seriously beginning to doubt his leaders' knowledge of electronics. Entire days were spent where GIR would do nothing but make waffles, eat octopi, watch alien B-movies and sing to himself about monkeys and leprechauns. I hastily skipped through those.  
  
I'm not exactly sure, but I think that the SIR unit they offered the invader called "Skoodge" looked just as decent, if not better. Perhaps GIR has a switch that changes him into "advanced" mode. Who knows. I should make a mental note to check that out.  
  
I guess it was fate that I only remembered that there was something wrong with my network connection with the Swollen Eyeball after I had spent hours in hopeful anticipation compiling the data in the disks. I plopped my worn- out self down on my bed. A minor setback, I told myself. It could be fixed in a couple hours, and I felt I needed a break anyway.  
  
I still don't know what compelled me to leave my room at the time. I thought that I was in the mood to be alone, as usual. But the darkness of my shell seemed to remind me of things I'd rather forget. Creaking my door open, I snuck into the hall and hobbled down the staircase.  
  
She was sitting there as usual, back slightly hunched and squinted eyes glued to the television screen. It's funny how I wasn't surprised when I realized that she was watching a chick flick. The kind of tragic love story that made melodramatic girls cry in the end. A definitely big departure from her heavy metal concert DVDs. My hand tightened on the railing at the bottom of the stairs when I saw her eyes. They seemed to sparkle with youthful beauty, and yet they looked so sad, as if she was ready to cry a torrent of tears from them. It was so out of character for her it was spooky.  
  
"Gaz?"  
  
Startled, my sister hit the Power button on the remote, turned her head to me and nodded it low, allowing her plum-colored bangs to hide her sorrowful eyes.  
  
"Yeah, what?" She was trying her best to sound angry.  
  
"Are you... okay?"  
  
I tried to be as sincere as I could, approaching my sibling on the couch and sitting down beside her. I couldn't help but notice how torn she was- should she tell her brother what was bothering her, or keep it to herself? I hoped to God that she would tell me. I wanted to know so badly... Besides, guilt had been piling on me to spend more time with her. Being concerned about my sister gave me a secondary reason to live, behind bringing down the Irken invader.  
  
"Yeah, I guess..." Gaz said, hiding her face from me by picking up her Poop Cola can and taking a sip from it. She sounded a little more like her usual self. Maybe it was better she didn't open up. Things were fine the way they were... I guess.  
  
I smiled, hoping that my presence brought her a little comfort, no matter what that was. Little things like this make me happy to exist. I'm pathetic, I know. It's just nice to know that you matter sometimes. I blurted out the next words before I even knew they were coming.  
  
"Tell you what. Let's hit the mall. Bloaty's for dinner. My treat."  
  
Gaz smiled. I can't remember the last time I saw her smile- she only smiled when I was too busy getting beaten up or mutilated by either her robotic assassins... or Zim. I knew I had to make up for abandoning her earlier for my para-science. This was going to be a night to remember. 


	3. Bees in My Stomach

Chapter 2 Bees in My Stomach  
  
Our trip to the mall and Bloaty's Pizza Hog was, in a word, perfect. I don't want to ruin my idyllic memory of our night out by describing it word- for-word here because I fear that I can't do it justice. We were both in the mood. The zone. Whatever you want to call it. It was like we made up for a lifetime of being distant siblings with one night where we poured out all our repressed emotions. Oh, and TP-ing the Video Hut with Gaz was just bliss.  
  
We knew dad wasn't home, so it didn't matter what time we got back. I think it was past 2 in the morning. Thankfully the only thugs we have to worry about in our neighborhood are the green ones who plan on destroying the world. As far as I knew there was only one of those, and, occasionally, his short and chubby friend Skoodge, though I don't know where the hell he comes from.  
  
I watched over Gaz during our trip home, holding her hand tightly as we crossed the streets in almost pitch-blackness. The cold air chilled my already pale sister, and I proudly lent her my black trench coat, seeing that she forgot her gray windbreaker at home. We were in the middle of what was probably the longest, deepest and most intimate conversation we ever shared, discussing things ranging from past crushes to daring memories of escaping the clutches of probing scientists to good, old-fashioned rabid monkeys. Now it was about her favorite comic book, and though I've never read it, mine as well.  
  
"So then the nun stands up from her seat in a furious rage and says she's had enough... Then she blows up everyone's head!" Gaz said slyly. I burst into a disturbing fit of seemingly drunken laughter. I think it was two seconds before she erupted into boisterous laughter herself, for once with me rather than at me.  
  
"Hey, listen... Dib..." Gaz muttered between gasps for breath in the midst of her giggling. "And all the while the tour guide... Haha... The tour guide is standing there and... She's totally screaming at Johnny, saying it's all his fault and she's going to probably be sent to work at Taco Bell..."  
  
I almost fell over as we crossed the street. Admittedly, I was a little embarrassed when I had to lean on my sister to keep from keeling over and collapsing from maniacal chuckling. She embraced my figure and nestled her head into my neck, snuggling up beside me in the middle of the dimly-lit road. I felt her heart against mine, heard her giggles of joy as they escaped her mouth.  
  
You had to have been there. I don't know any way to describe this... This feeling. My large head seemed to know it wasn't exactly right, but it also knew that in my heart I had never felt more right in my entire life. I must have listened to the latter voice because I couldn't stop myself from twirling her hair in my fingers.  
  
The road seemed to disappear. Her clingy hug around my right arm, her cheek pressed into my shoulder, I glided along the sidewalk, hoping to God that I didn't stumble in my confusion and ruin all of this...  
  
As we passed under a streetlight, I turned my head towards hers. I wished that I could have a photograph of that moment. Maybe that's why I slowed my walking pace. My lips trembled at the sight of her... On me like this. But I closed my eyes and succumbed to my urges. I kissed the top of her head. My mind reeled from the complete overload of my bodily senses. The mere sight of her body. The touch of her hand. The sound of her breathing. The smell of apple shampoo on her hair. Mix that with human pheromones and you have pretty much the most beautiful scent imaginable. Even the taste of pepperoni in my mouth seemed inviting. My stomach churned. Did she know what she was doing to me?  
  
The scary thing, in retrospect- whatever it was she was doing to entrance me like this, I didn't feel the instinctive need to push her off. Sudden? Yes. Out of character? Yes. Disturbing? Strangely, no.  
  
But why, I thought? Then my thoughts went back to earlier in the night, in between my third and fourth slice of pizza, when I swore she was complimenting me on saving the world. I reluctantly admitted to myself that Tak, Zita, or any other girl for that matter, had never made me feel like this before... Had never made me feel good about myself. Good enough reason for me.  
  
Gaz and I strolled through the town's picturesque park, and I must admit, the shining moonlight reflecting off of my sister's amethyst hair was too perfect a sight to miss. I slowed my pace, and eventually stopped at the shore of the small lake the midst of the park, my sister joining me in admiring the view. Maybe all those bullies in school were right. I am a lunatic. I mean, the moon does stuff to me, I swear. Underneath those lunar photons, my temperamental little sister was the most stunningly beautiful person in the world.  
  
"You're so beautiful..." I muttered the words faintly and under my breath, not sure if I wanted her to hear me.  
  
Gaz slowly turned her squinted eyes from the moon and opened them to a warm and loving innocence as she turned them towards mine. My brown eyes, though, were hiding behind the frames of my large glasses. I wondered if the glare from the moonlight hid my pupils.  
  
My sister asked the inevitable question. "What?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
At this point I was pretty damn sure she heard what I said. I tried adjusting my eyes. Maybe the glare would hit my glasses if I got the right angle and cut off her stare. A bee flying in the distance caught my eye, and in desperation to fixate my eyes on anything but my sister, I followed its flight, thinking that I handled the whole issue well as I released my palms' sweaty grip on the outsides of my pockets.  
  
But I guess I wasn't going to escape that easily. She took me by the hand and looked me in the eye. I don't know what came over me.  
  
This urge... This uncontrollable desire... Call it whatever- male hormones or complete lack of attention and love in my life, but right then and there I wanted so much to kiss her. Kiss my sister on the lips and unleash this feeling that we both shared at the moment... Or so I hoped. This moment could not come and go without my doing something, without my passing this up. I pulled her close to me, took her left hand in my right, and fingered her skull necklace with my left. She gave me a look of expectancy... I knew that this would be it... Or at least it was supposed to be. If I messed up tonight I would lose her forever. So you won't believe what I did.  
  
In a strange little twist of events I grabbed the skull necklace, pulling it and its chain (whose buckle was on the back of the skull pendant) off of Gaz's neck, laughing, and, with it in my hand, making a mad dash for home. After a moment of taking in what I had just did, Gaz burst into a whiny little rage, as is her wont, and playfully chased after me. I guess the chase was not really important to her- I knew that she was gifted with some kind of superhuman athletic speed and strength, but was delighted to know that she was still playing along with me instead of tackling me like a pro wrestler.  
  
"DIB! COME BACK HERE!"  
  
I laughed, still not knowing what the hell I was doing. Strange human behavior. This innocent flirtation was still fun. I didn't know what would happen when this night was over- whether I'd perform some act of incest or not, but... This in-between stage, this... Playing around... It was a lot of fun. 


	4. The Really Short Chapter

Chapter 3 Really Short  
  
I wasn't sure whether I wanted this whole thing to blow off, and it seemed as if I was still playing it both ways. Gaz caught up to me as I wasted time unlocking the front door. Thank God dad was working late at the lab again, as always. Tonight it was for the best.  
  
I reached out to tickle Gaz as I walked backwards into the house. She giggled like she had never before. This was too good. I made for the stairs. Maybe I could find escape from this girl in the comfort of my dark room, and all the complicated emotions that I now associated with her. But did I really want to do that?  
  
Her frenetic running gave me no time for philosophical questions. I darted up the stairs, nearly tripping on my own feet. My sister didn't let me reach the top. I felt a tug on my left ankle just as I was about to clear the top step. The necklace dug into my palm as my grip on it tightened. She grabbed my shoulder as I fell, and instinctively I twisted my body around so as not to land on her as I tumbled. We literally rolled down the carpeted staircase, her on top of me. I anticipated my head crashing into the wall at the bottom and braced for impact, embracing my sister as we fell.  
  
I collapsed heavily on my backside- Gaz pulled me up at the last second, preventing me from crashing head-first into the wall. I was too stunned by what happened next to breathe a sigh of relief. My eyes sprung open in shock.  
  
Gaz had just half-landed onto me, her lips falling and locking onto mine in a moment that could have been awkward, but somehow ended up infinitely sweet and tender.  
  
My sister had given me my first kiss.  
  
And hers, too.  
  
Hearts throbbing, heads racing, neither brother nor sister flinched when we finally drew our lips apart from one another. She pulled her head back and smiled a little at me- a half-smile, hiding perhaps fear of what I would do next. I don't know if I smiled back at her. All I remember is being lost in her eyes, and stammering while telling her I thought that it was about time we got to bed.  
  
The loving way she crawled off of me and wished me goodnight reminded me that I still had morals. The gravity of the situation rushed back to me. Gaz must not have noticed the horror in my eyes when she told me to sleep tight. Without looking back I rushed up the stairs to my room, unknowingly dropping her necklace along the way. 


	5. The Aftermath

Chapter 4 The Aftermath  
  
Talking to the ceiling, I wondered if Gaz was undergoing the same moral dilemma as I was... Or was she under the impression that we really had something? It was much more comforting to hope that things would go back to normal, but at the same time disconcerting. Would we be doomed to live with that one day in mind, the day where we kissed?  
  
I didn't want to even think of it. Sleep came slowly that night. My computer monitor kept my room enveloped in a hazy blue glow. I had almost forgotten about the GIR video files. After school tomorrow I'd take care of them, I told myself before nodding off.  
  
The next morning came a little too fast for me. Breakfast was quiet as Gaz gave me hinting looks that I pretended not to see. It must have drizzled a little outside while I was sleeping. The gray clouds above foreshadowed an impending rainstorm.  
  
Gaz covered me with the black trench coat I lent her the day before and zipped her windbreaker up tight, smiling all the way. Before leaving I noticed that her Game Slave VIII still lay forgotten on the coffee table in front of the television screen.  
  
"Dib... Let's take the bus today."  
  
Without looking at my sister I nodded and mouthed "sure". Other than that I barely said a word to her, even as we walked down the humid street to the bus stop. She held my hand. I let her, but didn't reciprocate- I was determined to treat last night as if it never happened, no matter how attached she was to me.  
  
I think I broke Gaz's heart during the bus ride. I sat at the window seat, my chin held aloft by my palm, my elbow wedged against the glass pane as I watched the raindrops crawl down the outside of the window. The whole time she kept her eyes on me, waiting. Waiting for a sign.  
  
What was a brother to do?  
  
I guess doing anything would have been better than keeping quiet the way I did. It was the most uncomfortable 30 minutes of my life. Gaz ran out of the bus ahead of me when we got to school, her hooded head hunched over and arms clutching her backpack, which she held in front of her. I was barely able to walk myself to my classroom without chasing after Gaz to tell her I was sorry.  
  
"Today, children, at the request of the South American community, you will have a horrible hands-on activity on ancient Mayan sacrificial rituals!"  
  
I looked up from my seat carefully, lest I catch my teacher's eye. Miss Bitters was just as evil as ever. Ordinarily I was tired of being in her class year after year, from grade skool to middle skool, in the same seat to top it off. However, today it comforted me a little to be somewhere where everything was normal again. Where everything made sense in its own strange little way.  
  
Zim, inquisitive as always, was the first to pipe up.  
  
"These... Rituals... Do they involve farm animals?"  
  
Miss Bitters whip-cracked her eyes to meet Zim's.  
  
"No, Zim, but they do involve brutally slicing off the heads of randomly selected individuals and consuming their raw flesh under the moonlight."  
  
Zim's eyes brightened as he jumped on top of his desk and pointed an incriminating finger towards my countenance.  
  
"The Dib-monkey! Sacrifice him! Sacrifice him good!!!"  
  
I was depressed, yes, but in no mood to take this sitting down.  
  
"See! He's an alien! He wants to feast his checkered teeth on my human flesh!!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, standing atop my own desk. I really wanted to pummel that Irken with a water balloon and watch him writhe in pain.  
  
"You're crazy," came a familiar voice from behind Zim's chair. I sat down as the first of my classmates burst into laughter at my "ridiculous theory". I knew the voice, but I didn't even want to look at Zita today, cute as she was.  
  
The laughter continued even after Miss Bitters complimented them for insulting me. Why did I even try? These humans never listen to me. I clenched my fists and bit my tongue again. Knowingly Zim gave me a smirk and an evil glare from within his "human eye" contact lenses.  
  
Like I said, being here comforted me "a little".  
  
Recess came, and I wasn't sure whether I should walk into the cafeteria or not- Gaz would be waiting there for me as always, and I wasn't ready to face her... But what choice did I have? It's not like she was going to approach me herself and tell me she's okay with it... Or maybe she was. Maybe she'd realize how wrong all of this was. Gaz was as human as I was, after all.  
  
I peeked into the small window atop the swinging doors of the cafeteria. She was sitting there alone, in our usual spot, nibbling a hotdog. Her unused left hand looked like it was itching to get its hands on the control pad of her Game Slave VIII. Videogame withdrawal syndrome, I guess. Her right eye was twitching. No, she didn't look like she was holding up too well. Still, I had nothing to say to her... yet.  
  
From across the room I saw Zim dump out the contents of his food tray into the trash can. He must have noticed I wasn't there today to incriminate him in the act of disposing of the "poisonous worm-baby food".  
  
Idly I wondered if Zim noticed anything different in GIR- after all, the android didn't have much of a memory to begin with. I had better keep both of my eyes focused on him. He had been too quiet lately. Those files really needed to be sent. Before I left my little observation perch, I noticed Zim walking up to Gaz. Reading his lips I deduced my name sprouting from his alien mouth. My enemy was after my whereabouts. I had to get the upper hand.  
  
I put Gaz aside in my mind for a moment. There was work that needed to be done. From the most recent files in GIR's memory disk I saw Zim mulling over his latest plan, involving ticks, remote control cars and maple syrup. No, you're not alone. For the life of me I couldn't bring myself to understand how it was meant to work either. If only I had a graph of some sort, or something...  
  
Then it hit me. I had uploaded GIR's files already. Maybe it was time I gave the memory disk back, I thought- gather a little more about this "new plan". It would sure help take my mind off of my sister. 


	6. The Kitchen of Death

Chapter 5 The Kitchen of Death  
  
I rang the doorbell. The maniacal, high-pitched laughter I half- expected filled my eardrums with an unsettling feeling of... weirdness. I braced myself for the moment that dumb robot would crank open the door separating me from the enemy's fortress- a broken-off door to a men's room somewhere. That moment never came. Instead I reeled back in confusion as the house's "guardian" jumped out of the window, juggling a flaming baked potato.  
  
The strangely cute little creature ran around madly with the potato, hollering while squeezing exorbitant amounts of Poop™ Ranch Dressing on it as if it was a normal afternoon ritual. He then proceeded to throw it into his mouth, where it disappeared into the bottomless pit that was his "stomach". Interesting. Nevertheless, I had no time to waste. The Irken would be home any minute, I reasoned, pulling the memory disk out of my pocket.  
  
"Um... GIR..."  
  
"Yeeeeeessss?"  
  
The android smiled like a child in anticipation and turned to me innocently. He looked like a lost little puppy, even without his "disguise" on. Alien trickery, I would suspect, if the machine hadn't given me that look a thousand times already. He opened his huge mouth to speak again.  
  
"Do you got any of them pickled nachos?" I raised an eyebrow. It was pure luck that I had a magic marker in my trench coat. After pointing my finger at empty space, I turned my back on GIR and scribbled the word "NACHOZ" on the memory disk.  
  
"Here." GIR studied the memory disk, apparently not even recognizing it.  
  
God, he was stupid.  
  
GIR laughed. "You tryin' to fool me. This is no bag o' nachos."  
  
Okay, maybe not THAT stupid.  
  
"This is a chocolate ice CREAM sandwich!" GIR yelled, and swallowed the memory disk whole. After being pleased with myself I wondered if the disk would eventually end up where it was supposed to go.  
  
After a pause GIR looked at me right in the eye again. "Okay. Me have to check on the spinach puffs now. Bye-bye!"  
  
Satisfied, I retreated to a nearby tree overlooking Zim's house. Clichéd as sitting up in a tree was, It was the ideal spot to spy on a two- storey tall house in the middle of one of a roundabout in a dead end street. And there I waited.  
  
The night dragged on longer than I expected it to. Usually I'd sit obsessively in front of Zim's house watching him, but today it just didn't feel right... For once, I had something else to do. And I wasn't doing it. All I was doing was pushing the problem into the background as I always did when it came to my emotions. All they ever did was slow me down.  
  
I had an urge, an instinctual urge to call up my sister... It was just my inner loneliness talking again, looking for an easy way out of this. No. This waiting was a test... A test for my endurance. And to cut a long story short, at 1 in the morning I was relieved to have aced it. Clad in his "old beggar" disguise, the Irken strolled down the dead-end street to his house and pushed open his door.  
  
"Hm... What's on the agenda tonight... Repair robo-parents... And maybe take a nice bath in icky earth-paste. Ah... Earth-paste." He was mumbling to himself. Again. Well, at least I wasn't alone when it came to that. I took my cold binoculars in my hand and fixed my eyes steely onto the enemy's fortress, but the Irken invader had all but disappeared from my sight.  
  
However, I could still hear his malevolent voice. Sounds... Sounds coming from the kitchen... I pressed a button on my communicator watch, tapping into the bug I anchored underneath Zim's refrigerator the week before. He rarely discussed his plans outside of his underground base, and I was quite surprised this bug actually came in handy. The garbled mumbling quickly turned into clear dialogue.  
  
"Many times before have I tried to eliminate that monkey, disturbing as he is. This time, GIR, we will---"  
  
"Throw him a barbecue party? Coz I love barbecue..."  
  
As always, a disturbing silence followed GIR's remark.  
  
"No, GIR, there will be no barbecue parties. Instead, we are going to---"  
  
"—but why???"  
  
Zim gave in. "All right, all right, after we lure in and capture the worm-baby and hold open his eyelids and force him to watch on my monitor as my giant tick-car-parasite-pirate-beast wreaks havoc on the world... Then maybe you can have your barbecue party. Myself... I'll just be eating waffles."  
  
I should have been horrified at what he said. However, all I could think of at the second was how Zim could eat waffles when his skin was burned by meat, vegetables and other earthly foods. Before it fully hit me what Zim meant by "lure in and capture the worm-baby", GIR's screaming at the top of his robotic lungs shocked me nearly out of the tree I was lounging in.  
  
"OH, YEAAAH!!! WAAAAA!!! I FORGOT!!! MY WAFFLES! MY RADIOACTIVE WAFFLES!" I heard the android rushing to the microwave, which had been whirring and buzzing in the background ever since I turned on my communicator.  
  
"GIR? What are you ---"  
  
Suddenly, everything stopped. For a fleeting moment I heard high- pitched feedback noises sprouting from my communicator. Then the blinding light, followed immediately by a vacuum of air. A wall of the sheer force of the explosion propelled me out of the tree. The last thing I remember was my head hitting something before everything faded to black. 


	7. A Portrait of Two Lovers

Chapter 6 A Portrait of Two Lovers  
  
I opened my eyes. A familiar feeling came back to me. That feeling you get when you wake of falling out of a dream and back into this harsh reality, with no clear memory of what life really was before... Or why I am alive.  
  
Damn, that really sucked.  
  
I forced myself up, and tried to focus my naked eyes to the scene before me. I was aching in places that had never ached before. I smelled blood. My own, I reasoned. How badly was I hurt? I stood up, feeling okay enough. My glasses lay broken on the floor, crushed under the tree I was perched in merely hours ago. Hours... How many? How long had I been here?  
  
What was Zim going to do to Gaz?  
  
I squinted my eyes at Zim's base- robotic tentacles were piecing its shattered walls back together. The roof-garage was left half-closed. Zim's Voot Runner was gone. My thumping heart felt like it was going to explode... Kind of like what happened to that lady on TV who thought Santa Claus had come back. I looked at my wrist communicator, even though I knew in the back of my mind that its circuits were scrambled from the explosion. There was no way of warning her... But what if he was already there?  
  
Before I spent even a second of my usual pondering I was running at full speed back to my house, which was only a few blocks away. Nothing I couldn't handle, I thought, until I heard an ear-splitting "CRACK" coming from my right leg. The pain surged up into my spine and shocked me out of my sprint instantly.  
  
I collapsed on my back screaming and burst into tears when I finally opened my eyes to see how far from my darkest dreams this injury was.  
  
No bone had pierced flesh, leaving me only to wonder how badly broken my leg was. Grabbing the asphalt, I pulled myself up onto the curb and yanked someone's mailbox out of the ground to use as a makeshift cane. The next few minutes I spent limping home were a blur of mind-numbing physical agony and emotional confusion. I had to find her. The blood, sweat and tears pouring from me only fueled my desire.  
  
I told myself that this wasn't about what happened at the bottom of the stairs- it was my duty as a brother that propelled me to run when I didn't even think I could anymore.  
  
The more I limped on, the clearer it became to me what the Irken's plan was. He had been waiting... Waiting for an opening to catch Gaz alone. Alone from me, her brother, who sat by her during every lunch break of our lives... In his eyes, after all these years of being by her side, I had finally given her to him. All the fingers were pointing incriminatingly at me. Fingers I couldn't ignore.  
  
At the sight of my familiar abode I called out her name. Leaving my cane on the lawn, I burst open the door, eyes wide open, fearing the worst, like any overly dramatic hero would.  
  
"GAZ!!!" I sobbed with reckless abandon, clomping as fast as I could around my lonely house, trusting my balance to my aching hands.  
  
My room. Her room. Empty. No signs of a struggle in the living room. A tinge of hope came back to me.  
  
Luring me in didn't necessarily mean kidnapping my sister. Besides, it wasn't like she was the only person close to me... Wait... Yeah, she was. Our self-important "roommate", who buys us pizza occasionally, apparently doesn't consider our relationship to be 'close', so I don't either.  
  
Besides, even if my sister did fit into Zim's plan, capturing her was sure to be anything but a cakewalk.  
  
I mean, this was GAZ here. Not Princess fucking Toadstool. When Zim abducted me she broke open an "unbreakable" Irken storage tank with a tap of her foot to save my life. Nobody ever lay a finger on my sister without her approval and lived... Right?  
  
Then I brought myself into the kitchen to look for signs of life... And maybe get a slice of Supertoast™. That's where I saw it.  
  
A notebook on the table in the middle of the dining area. A half-finished sketch rested on the open page. I brought the sketch pad near to my face so my naked, near-sighted eyes could see what was scribbled on it.  
  
It was the only clear thing I had seen since I'd woken up, though it felt like it was the only thing I'd seen clearly in my whole life.  
  
A boy and a girl. I recognized the two figures immediately. Gaz and I, she with a smile on her face and I with a look of courage in mine. We were locked in a loving embrace that I could literally feel. Her arms were wrapped around me, as if she was clinging on for dear life. Beneath my lightly sketched glasses, my amber-colored eyes were intensely focused on her, telling her that I'd never leave her side, that I would be the one sure thing she could hold on to in this cruel, uncaring world. Her half- closed eyes, the same color as mine, looked serene, and her eyebrows frowned gently to push out the few tears of relief that streamed down her face. I could feel the power of the drawing, the raw, hormonal emotion that my sister poured into it. It was then, then that I knew that the girl I was going to rescue meant much more to me than a sister. I was going to dedicate whatever life I had to her happiness... To make my Gaz, my sister, my beloved, smile the way she did in that sketch.  
  
Oh, and all of this came to me in about two seconds.  
  
I'll never forget that drawing. None of the usual skeletons, flaming pigs or witches. Just my sister and I. And, across my arm, a violent diagonal line dragged across the page. Someone had caught her off guard and pulled her out of her chair in the middle of her masterpiece.  
  
Zim.  
  
I bit my lip and plodded on, unwittingly putting my weight on my bad leg, forgetting it was broken, and collapsing onto the table in mid-scream. The pain rushed back to me, along with reason. Yup. My brain started working again.  
  
How could I stop him this time?  
  
The voices in my head returned to tell me how this would all end. A dark cloud on the horizon as the Irken Armada made their way to Earth to turn us all into snack-manufacturing slaves or call-center workers or Vortian prison guards. Whatever was worse. Fires spreading across the city. Mexican food flying everywhere. I had seen it before through Zim's goggles, like some funky inevitable premonition... of DOOM.  
  
Then I heard the unmistakable sound of his voice. It echoed throughout the city as if it was booming from the very foundations of the earth itself. What sounded like footsteps, rhythmic poundings, made my eyes and ears twitch. I didn't dare turn my head up to witness the horror that he was instilling upon the city now. I didn't have enough strength in me.  
  
All hope faded from my sight. I took one last look at the heavenly sketch, trying not to get it wet or smeared with my shaking, tear-soaked hands.  
  
Without even knowing it I called out for my mother. The mother that was never there for me. The mother I don't even remember. When I came to the harsh realization that nobody was going to cradle me in their arms, a new wave of tears overcame me. Why did all of this have to happen to me? Why, now that I finally found love after all these years, did I reject it? I wanted to wake up... Wake up and live yesterday all over again.  
  
Hey, wait a minute... I did that before, didn't I? Travel into the past to warn myself about something... Aw, whatever. Must have been another fantasy of mine, because at that horrible moment, all I could hear was my own voice, telling myself...  
  
Gaz was the only woman left in my life, and I couldn't save her.  
  
Let the Irkens take the planet, I told myself, if this was to be our fate. Wherever my Gaz and I were going afterwards, we could go together as two dead souls taking comfort in one another, as opposed to two live siblings that the world would look down upon.  
  
Yes, I mused, it would be certainly easier to die than to face what I was up against- and I don't just mean Zim. In the shadow of death I could escape from what I had become- a gargantuan-headed, impulsive, hopelessly romantic, incestuous control freak... I was a lost case and I knew it. Not even roast turkey was worth living for anymore.  
  
I forced my aching leg up onto the table. It quelled some of the pain. Besides, it was the least I could do before the end.  
  
After all, I expected that a day like this would come.  
  
Eons seemed to pass within myself in that dark hour. I screamed out loud for all the regrets I tried to push back into my mind, all the times I'd suffered at the expense of others, for the sake of finding recognition, attention... perhaps love.  
  
I felt the pain leaving my leg. I eyed the mailbox cane that I left out on the front lawn. It seemed to mock me- even if I went out there, what could I do?  
  
Man, I sure have a problem with asking myself questions I already know the answer to, even when I'm telling a freakin' story.  
  
My more minor wounds slowly became apparent to me. Two large gashes across my back, bruises all over my left arm, tiny glass cuts along my torso and neck and a part of my right ear torn loose. As I lost consciousness I prayed to whatever gods may be that it would all be over before I woke up.  
  
***  
  
My eyes opened to the same cursed kitchen. Maybe it was what heaven looked like...  
  
Nah. Stupid Dib.  
  
I barely remembered what was going on at first- I was losing too much blood. While wiping my face clean I noticed that the refrigerator had just stopped humming. Finally, moved by my instinctual curiosity, I glanced outside the window and into the city. Sparks were flying in the distance. Electrical poles sprouted blue lightning. Zim had attacked the power plant.  
  
I heard a horrible ruckus from the garage. The restraining system I had put on Tak's ship had gone off-line. A familiar female voice piped up. I knew I should have pulled the plug on "upgrading" the crashed Irken cruiser a long time ago- I was downloading some new Vortian software into its mainframe.  
  
"DIB!!! ZIM!!! Where are you?"  
  
Yeah, this is what you get for wanting to play Solitaire on your alien ship.  
  
The garage door burst asunder. A robotic tentacle erupted through the window I was looking out of and grabbed me around the waist. Before I knew it I was being held aloft seven feet in the air by Tak's crashed Irken ship, which had maneuvered itself over the front lawn. Her downloaded personality interface boomed out of a speaker in her cockpit.  
  
"I see you've been able to repair my rear thrusters. Now, to avenge my mistress' defeat, I shall..."  
  
At this point I lost concentration. I had almost forgotten that she had a slightly British accent. It was unnervingly cute, but I kind of regret not keeping my own personality downloaded into the ship, confused and insecure as it was. Still, I couldn't bring myself to care. At the moment I half-hoped that the ship would snap my frail body in half.  
  
I remember that Gaz alone knew how to make it function without Tak's personality, from the time years ago when she saved me from being stranded on an ice floe... If only she were here, I thought. My thoughts always came back to her.  
  
Yet still, all I could say was,  
  
"T-Tak's ship!"  
  
I blurted it out predictably, almost to myself. The ship gave a little electronic groan of irritation.  
  
"As I was saying..." she continued, exasperated. "I shall extract Zim's coordinates from your unusually large head, and take him to the Control Brain for his horrible judgment... Then my mistress will return..."  
  
I stopped listening at the mention of Zim's name, raised an eyebrow and pointed at the besieged metropolis. "Oh, Zim... He's over there, wreaking uncontrollable havoc on the city."  
  
The voice whined as the tentacles tightened their grip. "Don't tell me you've forgotten what you and that... that horrible Irken did to me! My mistress is coming back for this planet, I swear to you! The Tallest shall have their snack tribute! TELL ME WHERE HE IS!!!"  
  
"But... I just did." Damn, Irkens sure have hearing problems. Maybe that's owing to the fact that they have no ears.  
  
"Oh... Right..." The ship turned its cockpit towards the currently-in-the-state- of-being-ravaged city. It lowered its binding tentacle to place me on the ground.  
  
"Wait! I'm going with you. He's got my sister." I said boldly, hoping that since I was nothing more than a worm in the mud to Tak before she left, her ship would let me tag along for the ride.  
  
Tak's ship didn't say anything, but I felt the pain around my waist loosen as more blood rushed back into my broken leg. The tentacle dropped me abruptly into the cockpit. I ignored the pain- the fire was burning in my eyes now. Zim was going down. Hope was rekindled. I took one last look at the sketch pad, which still lay perfectly intact under the shattered glass on top of the table.  
  
I was coming for her. 


	8. The Girl in the Snow Globe

Chapter 7 The Girl in the Snow Globe  
  
The wind blew through my scythe-esque hair until Tak's ship raised the windshield-thingy. I breathed a sigh of relief. My hands, however, were firmly gripped on the joystick that steered the spacecraft. It was too early to get comfortable. Comfort. I winced at the thought of that word, as if it was a feeling I would never experience again.  
  
It wasn't the whole rescuing my sister thing that shocked me the most. I had never felt this emotional over losing someone. Thinking of her lovingly like this was a far, far cry from what I had felt towards her a few days ago- anger and lifelong resentment. How did things change so quickly?  
  
Dammit, why couldn't I stick to what I was doing?  
  
My desire for attention and recognition as the fifteen year-old who brought down the alien had all but faded ever since that night at the bottom of the stairs.  
  
I shuddered, keeping my twitching eyes focused on the horizon. Whatever was going on inside me back in the shadows of my kitchen, I didn't need it. Especially not right now.  
  
Out of the mist I could see, even with my naked eyes, the silhouette of the ferocious beast that was ravaging the city. It was... for lack of any other word, huge. A swarming mass of oozing syrup and restless insects, and what looked from the outside like a reptilian creature squirming at its core.  
  
Great. Locustzilla.  
  
Well, at least I don't have to holler at the top of my lungs to try and convince everyone that he EXISTS.  
  
Further examination showed that in the outer-middle of the creature's torso there was a strange screen-like device, like a big-screen television. Zim's face flickered on and off of the screen- the video feed was messed up. God, that alien sickens me. Ripping off monster ideas from the Telletubbies.  
  
Taking my eyes off of the beast I breathed in deeply, noticing with anxiety the darkness expanding progressively in the morning sky. As I drew nearer and nearer to the beast I found myself echoing the words in the back of my mind...  
  
"Lure in the Dib-monkey..."  
  
I was falling into a trap. And I was doing it practically voluntarily.  
  
Amid the sound of my humming engine, the deafening buzz of the locusts and the screams of the fleeing people below, I discerned his voice booming from a nearby rooftop. Uncontrollable laughter, aware of nothing but itself and its sadistic pleasures. He was daring me to retaliate. Tak's ship was warning not to get to close to the monster. I took no heed of its ranting.  
  
Circling around past the locust-thing, I swerved the ship to slightly above the building to get a better view of whatever it was Zim was doing. The laughter stopped.  
  
"CURSE YOU, inferior Earth projector! The future slaves must WITNESS their master's evil grin! WHY must you disrupt their grin-witnessing?"  
  
He was precariously throttling a digital video camera on a tripod. The fool's own video equipment must have gotten fried when his base exploded.  
  
Zim's frustrated ego allowed me a slight window of opportunity to sneak up on him. I was already picturing my moment of victory, twiddling my thumbs around the laser trigger-button thingy. All I needed was one clean shot...  
  
"THWACK!"  
  
My own Greatest Person That Ever Lived Award had been slammed right into my face. The locust-beast had knocked me out of my flight. I heard one of the thrusters snap off of my fragile craft. Fire erupted in the cockpit soon after I realized I was headed for a long fall. Thinking quickly, I pushed forward a toggle that shot out the ship's robotic claws to either side, steering as close as I could to the little green boy thirty feet below me. He held his ground like a dumb little soldier, a look of mingled surprise and uncertainty in his red eyes.  
  
At the last second I pulled up, aiming to mow over the alien, and hopefully use him as a nice lice-retardant landing cushion. Instead Zim ducked his head. He got lucky, I thought, bracing myself for impact.  
  
My life flashed before my eyes. Nothing I wasn't used to.  
  
Offering Tak a piece of meat as we sat on a picket fence...  
  
Watching Zim eating waffles in his kitchen from my computer screen... It still baffles me how he does that...  
  
Scrubbing the shadow pig-thingy overlord's toilet...  
  
That woke me up. I picked my dazed self up from the rooftop quickly, noting that this was the first time in years I've been knocked out twice in one day. I never found out how long I was out, but it couldn't have been for longer than a few seconds, because the first thing I saw upon waking was Zim's shadow flickering as I stood up, effectively blocking the light beaming from the burning engine of my ship. The nearly-veiled sun opposite my side of the building illuminated his shadowy presence before my blurry eyes. He was turning around to face me.  
  
I heard the alien sneering at my face from his little camera perch a few meters away. Ignoring my aching limb, I spread my legs into a fighter stance, putting on my meanest cowboy face as if this was the showdown of the century.  
  
"All right, Zim! Where's my sister?" I said, my voice rising to a surprisingly high pitch as my trembling mouth blurted out the words.  
  
"Oh, and, um... Deal with the huge monster, too." I added as an afterthought, my thumbs jerked towards the direction of the locust-beast, which was apparently taking a bite out of a huge Mac Meaties sign.  
  
I didn't need to see it. Years of hatred taught me that Zim's retaliating gaze was so wicked it seemed to pierce my flesh. "Ah... Dib. I was expecting you." He needlessly knocked over the camera he was toying with and began twiddling his gloved fingers.  
  
I wasn't going to be intimidated by this clown. "WHERE IS SHE?"  
  
The subtle sound of bird droppings falling onto my trench coat permeated the silence following my exasperated scream. At least nobody was here to laugh at it this time.  
  
Zim just raised an eyebrow, closed his eyes and shook his head, sighing mockingly.  
  
"Dib, Dib, Dib... Can you not see I am busy doing... doing really HORRIBLE things to people?"  
  
"I'm SERIOUS, ZIM!!!"  
  
Sweat poured down my face as the heat from the smoldering ship warmed my backside. I dared a brief look backwards and realized that I had crashed the ship pretty close to the building's edge. I was expecting a trap to enrapture me at any moment, but I didn't flinch at all. As far as I was concerned, I was saving the world, and that always gives me strength.  
  
"Fine, fine," he murmured, shrugging his shoulders while rolling his eyes. It was clear he had rehearsed this little charade and could barely contain his giddy fantasies of whatever form of pain he was preparing to inflict upon me.  
  
"GIR!!! Bring forth the Dib-monkey's sister!"  
  
A small ice cream stand in the corner of the rooftop that I only seemed to notice at the mention of those words exploded as a familiar SIR unit burst out of it giggling, covered in rocky road and cookie dough.  
  
"YAY! We all gonna have a naked burrito campfire dance!"  
  
As GIR leaped off the building to bring up my sister, my stomach churned. My already-wide eyes widened even more in horror as a vision of a tied up, crying, horse-whipped Gaz strewn about on the floor of a tiny portable jail cell entered my mind.  
  
Nah. Just those nightmarish hallucinations again that Miss Bitters calls "the real world".  
  
Instead I saw the explosive little android fly up the side of the building, humming a strangely familiar tune. He was carrying an enormous glass snow globe... with my Gaz in it. She was wearing an astronaut suit and looking almost bored as she sat down on the broken-off head of what I assumed was once a snowman anchored inside the globe with her. GIR dropped the globe right in the middle of the roof, shaking up all the artificial snow inside it. Gaz, however, didn't move a muscle.  
  
In fact, she didn't stand up when she saw me; indeed, she didn't even seem to notice I was there. I tried to talk, and for once in my talkative life, I couldn't. I didn't know what to say. My heart, which took a quantum leap at the sight of her beautifully pale face, sank back down into my stomach. Not wanting to lose hope at a pivotal moment like this, I told myself that she just couldn't see me, and left it at that.  
  
I mentally kicked myself. Why was I being so selfish again? I should have been elated that she wasn't hurt. My first instinct was to run over and check up on her, but before I knew what I really wanted to do, Zim cleared his throat and piped up again.  
  
"Now, Dib, at least you will have an audience to behold your tortured screams of AGONY!"  
  
With that, the Irken leaped into the air and struck a little pose. Blurred diagonal lines and operatic male choir music overwhelmed my senses as Zim summoned forth powerful cybernetic limbs to his frail body.  
  
Before I knew it my four-foot tall archenemy was clad in a robotic suit of doom, complete with concussion missiles, war paint and evil giant squids as hands. He now stood about a hulking eight feet in the air.  
  
Lesson: don't mess with an insecure, mentally unstable short guy.  
  
During his period of inevitable psychotic laughter, I made a quick mental inventory search for something I could throw at Zim. I had a cut-out tabloid picture of the Loch Ness Monster, a 7-stick pack of chewing gum and my busted wrist communicator scattered around in my pockets. Damn. No muffins.  
  
I rolled over just in time to dodge a fully-charged laser cannon. Thankfully I landed on my good leg. A familiar voice called out weakly from behind me.  
  
"Distract him, HUMAN! I'll divert all power to my weapons systems!"  
  
My face beamed. After the crash I doubted that Tak's ship would ever be working again- after all, she built it herself out of scrap metal from planet Dirt. I assumed that Zim didn't hear her voice, because he charged towards me recklessly inside his robot suit.  
  
I quivered at the sight of the giant squids, but bravely stood up to the menacing green bully, picking up a fallen piece of the ship's metal from the rooftop and discus-throwing it right at the vulnerable heart of Zim's mech, where the alien himself was perched.  
  
Zim cringed, causing his robot to lose balance in mid-run. I ducked down, and felt him trip over me almost instantly. I turned around to see him land in a heap right in front of Tak's ship.  
  
I must have hit him right in the squeedly skooch.  
  
Before I could get myself up from the floor, Tak's ship had blown away the right arm of Zim's robot, and was using its claws to maneuver itself, skillfully dodging the deadly squid tentacles on Zim's left arm.  
  
While the two battled on the building's edge, my head spun at everything that was going on. I could hear attack choppers in the distance, no doubt combating the locust-creature- after all, it wasn't half as cute as Pipi the Hamster. Larger transport helicopters with huge speakers were ordering the city to be evacuated. I saw the mutated beast extend one long arm, seize a chopper and drop bare human skeletons seconds later, all metal and flesh within consumed by the rabid mutant insects. Air force jets whizzed overhead to take the place of the fallen copters, firing waves of missiles at it unsuccessfully. I turned my head back to the snow globe. GIR was rolling around on top of it, screaming things about mashed potatoes that I can't bring myself to remember. But Gaz... Why was she still just sitting there?  
  
Robo-Zim and Tak's ship were still going at it. I limped my way over to Zim with whatever willpower I had left, unsure of what I could do to help my badly damaged ship out.  
  
"We meet again, Zim! When I bring back your nearly lifeless body to my Tallest, you shall suffer! SUFFER in ways that have not been suffered through... until, uh... you suffer in those aforementioned ways!"  
  
"TAK!!! Do not hoard any more of my precious time, you... You wicked hoarder of time, you!"  
  
Sounds like a typical Irken conversation, doesn't it?  
  
In frustration, Zim broke free of Tak's ship's binding tentacles and leaped into the air. Tak's ship fired fiercely at him, but Zim landed right in front of it with a huge stomp and a burst of electricity, emitting a paralyzing shockwave that knocked it right off of the rooftop and knocked me off of my good leg and onto my back. Just as the ship came sputtering back towards Zim, he launched a missile at it, sending my only ally careening towards a nearby skyscraper.  
  
I resisted the urge to scream "NOOO!!!" and bit my bottom lip, despair finally sinking into my consciousness. Zim closed the gap between us, and I pulled myself up to face him, knees shaking and all. He kicked me down as if I was a rag doll, and anchored me to the rooftop with his other robotic leg. I tried to catch my breath, but I couldn't see any reason to. The pain was too unbearable. Finally, Zim raised his remaining squid-arm to suck God-knows-what out of me with its suction cups. I winced.  
  
"YEEESSS!!! This will be TOO easy!" Zim said. He stopped to pause for a second. He repeated those last two words to himself again, his blood-red eyes with a hint of suspicion in them.  
  
"Dib..."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Tell me, my humongous-headed worm-baby friend, what do you have up your sleeve this time?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"NONSENSE! You're lying!"  
  
Oh, come on. This was just stupid. I dared to look him directly in the eye. Not like I could focus on his ugly visage without my glasses anyway. My defiant frown seemed to quell his fury.  
  
I could tell he was a little surprised how easily this had come- Zim had been looking forward to ending my life for years, even more so since the rubber piggy space-time object replacement incident. Again, from years of hateful knowing, I read the obvious twitch in his eye as a sign that he had reluctantly accepted that being torn apart by tentacles was a just end for me, his mortal enemy.  
  
This was the inevitable doom I was fearing. Flames everywhere and a wild- eyed maniac hovering above me. I was still afraid. But at least this time I knew why. Please, I prayed to whatever Paranormal Science Gods were up there, please let me speak to Gaz one last time.  
  
My nemesis must have read my mind as easily as I read his.  
  
"Humph! I only wish I could have enjoyed it more. I had a Megadoomer 2 in storage somewhere... Aw, well. It's a shame you have to die so easily." Zim snorted, cocking his squid tentacle thing like a shotgun in a Hollywood movie. "Any last words, Dib-monkey?"  
  
With this Zim withdrew his foot from my chest to give me some breathing and speaking room. But I wasn't looking at him.  
  
Gaz discreetly drew her eyes up from the white Styrofoam-covered floor of the snow globe to hear me out. GIR had his aqua-colored eyes stuck onto the glass, hoping to catch my sister's attention with his mindless ranting.  
  
I was ready. Ready to say what I've been needing to say all along. I opened my mouth to speak, not knowing for sure what was going to burst out of it.  
  
Words were no weapons. Words wouldn't stop him from doing what he was going to do. But words could make everything seem right for once, even if it was too late for me. 


	9. I Need You

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, or Poop Soda® or Poop Corn® or Game Slave ®. Heck, I don't even own this PC. Not until I turn 18 at least. But if anyone tries to claim this piece of crappy fiction as their own... Well let's just say I know a 400-pound wolf-man who will personally devour the soul of anyone who dares to do that. Also, let this count for a disclaimer in the other chapters that don't have one, at least until I feel like updating them.  
  
Chapter 8 I Need You  
  
My body tensed, reacting to the faint breeze that chilled the coat of sweat covering my pale skin. I painfully rolled over on my side to face Gaz. She was there, and we were together, for the last time maybe before the ending of the world, as well as our lives.  
  
I wanted to search for the right words, the ones that the bravest heroes in movies always say before they die... The words that immortalize them.  
  
So I gave it my best shot. And I said it damn good.  
  
"I love you, Gaz... I love you more than anything."  
  
Go on, laugh. I totally immortalized that line.  
  
Besides, I learned that day I learned that it's not always about what you say. It's about saying it right. More on that later.  
  
It was a moment of defeat, and at the same time a moment of pride. For once in my life, after I said something I didn't micro-analyze every syllable I spoke. I didn't kick myself for saying it. I just remember the words flowing, flowing instinctively like when I would speak to myself in the melancholic gloom of my room... Except this time it wasn't to myself. Obviously. God, I am horrible at this dramatic writing thing, what with these blatantly obvious observations and all.  
  
With his robotic foot, Zim turned me back over onto my back and stepped on my chest again, almost crushing one of my ribs. But my eyes never left my sister.  
  
"Your emotions betray you, human." Zim spoke with authority, his nodding head raised high. He raised his tentacled arm. "And now, Dib... You will die."  
  
That... line... I know I heard it somewhere before... Pain... Damn it, Zim! I knew it was inevitable. I just wanted it to be over with already. I wanted to disappear. But then I took a deep breath, and I was calm again.  
  
I could have died right there and then. In fact, logically I should have. I disengaged myself from my bodily pain, and at this time it all seemed to vanish.  
  
But as I closed my eyes, embracing my not-so-moosey fate, I heard the sound of breaking glass.  
  
A flood of water rushed around my body, and I shuddered as I tried to sit up, my body anchored as it was under the alien's robotic suit. My eyes sprung open with shock. And I'm glad they did.  
  
My Gaz was flying twenty feet above the building, her demonic yet angelic body propelled by her own dark powers and insatiable fury. In a fit of rage she stripped herself of the astronaut suit. Eying the Irken, Gaz emitted a deep-voiced, inhuman scream, and with her horrible eye-lasers she propelled Zim's robot off of me and across the rooftop where he crashed with a large THUD.  
  
I crawled backwards on my hands and watched in awe at the spectacle. The sun crept out from behind the clouds as a figurative female operatic choir sang out loud behind my sister. Gaz slowly descended to the rooftop, and her now-calmed figure stood right beside mine.  
  
Then she did something I never thought I was going to see her do again. She smiled. She smiled as she offered me her hand. I was so lost in her eyes at first I didn't notice she was trying to help me up. My sister pulled me firmly on my good leg again and let me lean on her. Her hair still smelt like heaven. Heaven. I still wasn't sure if I was there... Or if this shit was real.  
  
I stood myself up on my own, still a little embarrassed to have to lean on my own sister when I should be the pillar of support. It's older brother syndrome, you know? Guess I still had my issues.  
  
Together we stared keenly at Zim, who landed in a heap on the roof. The flooding water from the broken snow globe caused his robotic suit to spasm and electrocute him. He looked a little like Frankenstein's monster... after one too many bowls of electrified Frankenchokies. The poor Irken struggled out of his metallic creation and fell right into the shallow pool of water that coated the perimeter, which burned his fragile skin to a crisp even more.  
  
I almost felt sorry for him. I stood there, speechless, while Zim was doing his usual run around and twitch and scream in agony in all his pain and confusion thing and GIR sat there, eating uncooked popcorn kernels out of a bag and rolling around laughing like this was the funniest thing in the world.  
  
"Aaaah!!! It burns!!! It burns!!!" The alien called out in wailing terror.  
  
Gaz looked at me, smiled, then turned back to Zim. She only had one thing to say to him.  
  
"WHINER!!!"  
  
She knew that would make me smile. I couldn't take my eyes off of her, and this time I wasn't shy about it. We exchanged glances.  
  
Gaz raised one eye, smirked and asked, "Dib... What took you so long to just... say it?"  
  
I shrugged my shoulders uneasily, not sure if I should answer the question. Gaz burst into an awkward fit of laughter, and I quickly followed her, at first forcing a chuckle but then honestly realizing how silly this situation was. Still, I was too surprised by what was happening to feel embarrassed by her question.  
  
And then, amidst the struggling alien, the roaring beast, and the deafening sound of the choppers, she broke the laughter and embraced me. And I held on to her for dear life. I felt her heart, for the first time, beating against mine through my drenching clothes, if only to let me know I was alive. It was the first time I had ever hugged someone, and the single tear streaming down my cheek told me that she was the only hugger I'd ever need.  
  
Nothing made sense. I didn't even understand why she loved me in the first place. I didn't understand why she led me on like this, why she allowed herself to be kidnapped, why she didn't escape. Was she... Testing me? No, I couldn't even think that. Not now.  
  
Hell, even if she was, I didn't care. I knew she loved me, and that was enough.  
  
This wasn't heaven. It was too damn good for heaven.  
  
As we broke our embrace, she pulled a single blueberry muffin out of her pocket (God knows how that got there) and winked as she stuck it in my hands. It was like the punch-line to the ultimate inside joke, and a final affirmation that we were made for each other.  
  
With her arm supporting me, Gaz and I walked giddily over to Zim, beaten and battered as he was, ready to give him a piece of our collective minds.  
  
A/N: Please tell me what you guys think about this latest one (and the lame- ass Star Wars reference)!!! I need some constructive criticism!!! 


	10. The Angel From My Nightmare

Disclaimer: IZ and characters = not mine. This story is though.

Chapter 9 The Angel From My Nightmare  
  
So there we stood, dripping wet, on a Tuesday afternoon, in the same spot at the edge of the lake that we were in not two days ago. It was all so ironic.  
  
Oh, wait. First let me say that I'm sorry if I'm cutting into the future a little bit, but I felt that I could leave out the part of the story where Gaz and I flew down on Zim's ship towards the city, getting the locust-beast to follow us, landed the ship near the huge lake, attached two jumper cables from Zim's ship to the car-portion of the monster, shocking it into careening helplessly into the lake, where the locusts surrounding it got electrocuted and/or drowned and the parasite within was exposed to the sun's radiation, which caused it to erupt into an agonizing struggle and thrash about until a meteor fell from the sky and hit it in the head, killing it instantly. Nope, you didn't miss a thing.  
  
So, uh, back to my sister and I and the weirdest day we'd ever had playing hookey.  
  
We looked back in unison at the other side of the lake, and took a few well-earned breaths of relief. Water from the meteor explosion had covered the better half of the city. The smoldering wreckage of Zim's disasterpiece in the midst of the lake seemed farther than it was. Similarly, I felt farther from what I like to refer to as my "old self" than I had ever been. I like to think that my sister knew that; after all, there was a lot more than mischief I detected behind her sly grin.  
  
I knew I still had insecurities. I had psychological issues to deal with that might never stop haunting my waking days. But nothing worth worrying about now that I had someone who was going through the same transition I was. You see, with Gaz, everything was imperfect in just the perfect way…  
  
The pain resonating from my leg reminded me that I was being punished for loving her like this. But things changed now; I knew that by will or not, I could never love her any other way.  
  
She was every bit as beautiful as she was the other day, perhaps even more so as I was more open to acknowledging it.  
  
Suddenly, out of her fathomless well of supressed love, she drew out a laugh. A sincere laugh. And then she whispered into my ear gently, begging me to remember the last time we laughed together.  
  
And when I did it made it that much easier to hold her close to me, and breathe in unison with her.  
  
She held me tight enough to let me know how much she loved me, but with just the right amount of looseness I needed to break off the embrace if I felt uncomfortable. Of course I didn't; the very last thing I wanted was to let go.  
  
"I'm sorry, Dib, I'm sorry about everything, about..."  
  
"Shh... Not now." I put a finger to her lips and then ran it through her hair. I was no longer trembling, with my mind still running through our past, through all those dark nights I spent crying and feeling sorry for my pitiful self.  
  
I learned what it meant to be alone under those covers. But as I was to later learn, Gaz knew my pain; she could hear me through our walls. And for years in the past I imagined and hoped that maybe she'd care enough to at least notice, not knowing that she did.  
  
She was just afraid to let me know. And I don't blame her.  
  
After all, if I knew she was suffering inside too, what would I have done? What could I have done?  
  
We always pretended to forget about the select moments in our childhood where we actually acknowledged that we treasured each other's existence.  
  
These moments I knew were special for both of us, because even though we're polar opposites deep inside, the same blood my heart pumps flows through her veins as well.  
  
The same blood, and the same resentment for the weaknesses we both shared.  
  
And thus we lived, two shadows existing together under one grim roof, both aware of their plight, but neither knowing that only through each other could they find what they needed.  
  
It was inevitable that it would come to the point where Gaz and I weren't trapped behind bars anymore.  
  
I knew that no matter what it took, my sibling and I would make this last. What we had was inimitable. That she accepted me for my faults and I cared for her despite her tendency to explode and horrify me really meant something, or so I hoped.  
  
By now it was almost sunset, and the crimson sky, dotted as it was with orange and violet, was beyond surreal. We had been standing like this under the trees at the edge of the lake for quite some time, but because I was holding Gaz's hand, I only felt half as cold as I expected. The police sirens, nervous people, news crews and overall chaos on the opposite side of the body of water seemed to personify the mixed signals of this world, the world that we chose not to conform to.  
  
"This is it," she said suddenly. "The perfect moment. Kiss me, Dib. Kiss me now."  
  
I did not hesitate.  
  
As she leaned in for a kiss, I wished I had my glasses with me, when just two days ago at this very spot I tried to force my eyes out of focus. My love-naïve brain learned a second later that it didn't matter- all that was essential was invisible to the eye, yet perfectly clear to the heart…  
  
We locked lips with absolute total abandon.  
  
I closed my eyes as another new feeling overcame me, passing by gently but with a slight warning. It didn't matter what happened afterwards- I would never, ever regret this.  
  
And all too soon we opened our eyes again, and I looked at her with the same loving intensity that her ideal Dib did in her painting. I told her about it through my eyes, and we whispered sweet thoughts through our hopeful glances. Then we discussed the events that led to this; how she thought I ran away from home for good, and how I ran home only to find her gone.  
  
I knew I didn't need to impress her, but I wanted to, just to show her how much I care, superfluous as my words may have been.  
  
Neither of us felt like going home, even when the sun went down and our clothes had dried. I lent my gothic angel my trench coat again as we finally laid ourselves down comfortably on a grassy incline beside the lake. And as she accepted it, I wished I could tell her I knew that everything would be all right, that Dad would understand and we would live happily ever after. But I didn't say a thing. I didn't need to.  
  
Her smile told me everything I needed to know.

* * *

Epilogue

I never thought my life could change so drastically within those three days. And I still wonder what kind of life I'd be living if none of it ever happened.  
  
Yeah, I still look back and ask sometimes, what kind of brother am I?  
  
But now I no longer question whether what we are doing is wrong. I still think of it as a bit of a weakness, but I do take comfort in believing that what I do for this world exempts me from its rules, even if its people don't recognize what I do for it.  
  
Some would say it is an easy way out. Both people taking a familiar comfort in one another, their eyes ever straying from the path.  
  
But I don't believe that being together holds us back...  
  
No, no it doesn't at all.  
  
Yes, I admit that it all started out very shallow, like chasing a dream; two lonely hormonal teenagers with everything to explore and nothing to lose.  
  
But as the months passed, we began to realize that this dream had become more than a reality- it was to become our future.  
  
You may ask, "What future is there in loving one's own sister?" And from a certain point of view, you wouldn't be wrong.  
  
Still, neither of us know what a "better future" would be... I've lost all faith in everything but her... Yeah, I still fight Zim, but neither of us are really even trying anymore; he's become fond enough of this planet to even want to take it over, and I've grown more cynical of it. How ironic that it worked out that way.  
  
We were young then, and I both hoped and feared that all of these things, these feelings, would pass. We've come to accept it now; as I write this it's been four years since that first kiss, four years now of this doomed love.   
  
Well, I wouldn't go too far as to say doomed...  
  
But it's certainly bittersweet.   
  
I can never be the father of her children... We are and always will be forced to live a lie, and looked down on by those more "normal" than us.  
  
At times it does shock me… When she does the same one-eye-closed-raised-eyebrow thing exactly the way I do, or when I get pissed off, squint my eyes and say "whatever" just like she does…   
  
Sometimes I'll look into her eyes and see myself, and I'm sure she does the same.   
  
But I never trick my gargantuan (I've accepted it) head into abandoning her. She needs me as much as I need her, or maybe just a little bit more. She's finally found a reason to open her eyes.  
  
And I'm not about to take that away from her.

* * *

A/N: WHEW! It's done! Hope that was worth the effort. Thanks for the support, for your reviews and for your love, everyone!!! I finally finished my first fic!!! Please, please review! Make da moose happy! 


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